Too Much Time On My Hands...
I feel like I'm trapped, I have nothing better to do with my days. Shackled to my dreams I sleep most of my time away. They're beginning to show me things I had almost forgotten, Feelings I had thought I had put behind me. Desires from long ago creeping out of the woodwork. Faces that had left my mind long ago now appear vivid and unchanged. I feel this is my brains way of telling me something I am not seeing. Why would these people be on my mind at these of all times?

Rip Out The Wings Of A Butterfly...
Certainly a single post could not go by without any mention of her. This cruel mistress who haunts me with her inexistence. It seems she has left me, she has not visited my dreams as of late. Though she is constantly on my mind it seems like she is further from me than ever. When at first I felt she would drive me mad now I fear my sanity is in much more peril without her. She is a sick sad comfort of my twisted mind, yet I cannot cope without her. The loneliness grows deeper when even she has abandoned me. I could never hope to find her earthly counterpart, she was truly all I had. What do you do when even the girl of your dreams doesn't love you?

I Don't Like The Drugs, But The Drugs Like Me...
Caffeine, Nicotine, Alcohol, Diphenhydramine Citrate, Repeat. I can no longer function without a constant cocktail of stimulants followed by a calming dose of sleeping pills all while persistently munching a weeks worth of pain relievers in a day. It use to be I could ration out an ounce of weed and a dozen or so Oxys to get me threw the week. Times were much simpler back then. What has happened to me?

Run (I'm A Natural Disaster)...
I've been feeling so angry, I cannot stand to see anyone happy. My misery takes casualties. I see people around me enjoying their lives and all I can think of is ways to destroy it. I am being drawn towards violence. The simplest of things brings my blood to a boil. Solitude is becoming the only option. Everyone infuriates me to no end. Even my family stands in my cross hairs. My Mother has always been my rock, no matter what has happened in my life I have been able to look to her for guidance. Now it seems somehow she has become diminished in my eyes. Her actions and those around me only add to the problems. I feel like I have no more heroes to look to. How can they possibly help me when they can't seem to help themselves?

Time Out From The World...
I feel no connection to this world around me. I feel like I'm on the outside looking in and I can't look away no matter how hard I try. Its like being caught in the middle of an intersection while everyone crashes around me, and I'm trying so hard not to crash with them. I have no means to escape this feeling like everyone else's treachery is going to suck me further into the abyss. Where do I go from here?